i am a 34 year old mom of two. i have bags under my eyes, wrinkles, and a bunch of gray hair that i welcome gladly. i've always been a fan of naturally graying hair. no judgment if you dye your hair gray; you do you. anyway, i am almost positive that this is the agreed upon uniform for all moms of young children. there are clothes to be folded, dishes to be washed, a dog to be walked, a cat to be fed, and kids and a husband to care for. to be perfectly honest, i could make a laundry list of things that are out of place, dirty, completely missing, and broken. these are all things that come along with the joy and the busy of motherhood.
my day starts the same every day - with the small and gentle voice of my bright and cheery daughter. we snuggle in bed, eventually rubbing the sleep from our eyes as we roll out of bed. as soon as my feet hit the ground, i'm welcomed by the gleeful squeals of my gentle giant son. i open the door to his room, say "good morning!", my daughter yells "good morning!" and my son sinks into my arms for a quick morning hug. it is very much a highlight of my day - his moments of affection are rare but powerful. i attempt to fill our days with fun amidst the daily chores and expectations that fill everyone's lives. i attempt to fill my kids with huge amounts of love regardless of how tired i may be. i attempt to shield my children from the dangers and the unkindness that lurks around, what seems to be, every corner. i try to teach them about Jesus, compassion, love, humility, and honesty.
there are no shortages of teachable moments in our household. from "please be patient while i make your breakfast." to "i am sorry that i bumped you." and "please apologize to your brother/sister, that was not kind." there are also plenty of moments where i am as ungracious as a hippopotamus wearing ice skates playing the piano. (yes... there is a little bit of mo willems poking through.) i apologize to my children every day because my patience runs dry, i jump to a conclusion and punish too quickly, or ignored my kids because i was too distracted with social media or something else on my phone.
let's get real here... i'm horribly addicted to my phone and i am taking steps to better myself in that regard.
it is so important to apologize to your children. let's face it - mom's are not perfect and we frequently make mistakes involving our children. unfortunately, if you're like this mom right here... you also have self guilt where you play your mistakes over and over in our head, over analyzing and beating yourself up for hours because you hurt your babies feelings. it is all apart of the joy and the busy.
as a mom of a special needs child, i feel a different type of guilt and shame. just a quick browse of anything regarding autism and i am ambushed by people (some i thought friends and learned otherwise), articles, and videos that in some way tell me i am not doing enough. that i don't know what good parenting is because i don't assume the knee-jerk reaction because i now have a unique perspective on life. i am told i am not providing enough or disciplining enough (i'll discipline the autism right out of him!). i'm told i gave my child poison because i vaccinate and that is why he is the way he is. i have read comments and been told that my child is broken. the list goes on... and on and on and on and on.
it is hard enough being a mom in this world to a neurotypical child. it's doubly difficult being a mom of an autistic child. there's a whole new dynamic to life with a child that is differently abled. i say all of this because i think we all need to show more grace. we each have unique and different circumstances in our lives. we truly need to be QUICK to grace and SLOW to judgment. it is so easy to make hasty judgments on people and situations. be kind. show grace. love. because we are all going through life hoping to get by with joy through the busy.
my day starts the same every day - with the small and gentle voice of my bright and cheery daughter. we snuggle in bed, eventually rubbing the sleep from our eyes as we roll out of bed. as soon as my feet hit the ground, i'm welcomed by the gleeful squeals of my gentle giant son. i open the door to his room, say "good morning!", my daughter yells "good morning!" and my son sinks into my arms for a quick morning hug. it is very much a highlight of my day - his moments of affection are rare but powerful. i attempt to fill our days with fun amidst the daily chores and expectations that fill everyone's lives. i attempt to fill my kids with huge amounts of love regardless of how tired i may be. i attempt to shield my children from the dangers and the unkindness that lurks around, what seems to be, every corner. i try to teach them about Jesus, compassion, love, humility, and honesty.
there are no shortages of teachable moments in our household. from "please be patient while i make your breakfast." to "i am sorry that i bumped you." and "please apologize to your brother/sister, that was not kind." there are also plenty of moments where i am as ungracious as a hippopotamus wearing ice skates playing the piano. (yes... there is a little bit of mo willems poking through.) i apologize to my children every day because my patience runs dry, i jump to a conclusion and punish too quickly, or ignored my kids because i was too distracted with social media or something else on my phone.
let's get real here... i'm horribly addicted to my phone and i am taking steps to better myself in that regard.
it is so important to apologize to your children. let's face it - mom's are not perfect and we frequently make mistakes involving our children. unfortunately, if you're like this mom right here... you also have self guilt where you play your mistakes over and over in our head, over analyzing and beating yourself up for hours because you hurt your babies feelings. it is all apart of the joy and the busy.
as a mom of a special needs child, i feel a different type of guilt and shame. just a quick browse of anything regarding autism and i am ambushed by people (some i thought friends and learned otherwise), articles, and videos that in some way tell me i am not doing enough. that i don't know what good parenting is because i don't assume the knee-jerk reaction because i now have a unique perspective on life. i am told i am not providing enough or disciplining enough (i'll discipline the autism right out of him!). i'm told i gave my child poison because i vaccinate and that is why he is the way he is. i have read comments and been told that my child is broken. the list goes on... and on and on and on and on.
it is hard enough being a mom in this world to a neurotypical child. it's doubly difficult being a mom of an autistic child. there's a whole new dynamic to life with a child that is differently abled. i say all of this because i think we all need to show more grace. we each have unique and different circumstances in our lives. we truly need to be QUICK to grace and SLOW to judgment. it is so easy to make hasty judgments on people and situations. be kind. show grace. love. because we are all going through life hoping to get by with joy through the busy.
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